reunion

If there is anything cuter than matching mother/baby leopard print swimsuits, I don't know what it is...

This was taken at our family reunion in Lake Tahoe.

We had a great time seeing everyone. My mom is one of 14 kids, so we have a massive extended family. I would guess that I have close to 100 first cousins. It was so good to see everyone. Stella did great and just slept on the plane rides there and back.
For me, highlights of the trip were:
Trivial Pursuit Smackdown. My cousin Felicia is in law school and dating a classmate (Genaro) who recently qualified to be on Jeopardy. Trivial Pursuit in our family gets a little, well, intense, and the trash talking began early this year. I started hearing about it well before the reunion that there would be a challenge to my dominance of the game. ha. My favorite moment might have to be my gross overestimation of my sister-in-law Amanda's game face:

Q: What US city is across the border from Nuevo Laredo?
Me: "hmmm...."
Amanda: "I request the right to answer if she gets this wrong."
Me: "Jeez, I don't know, could it be Laredo..."
Amanda: "I withdraw my request!"
Me, thinking there's no way that is right, she is trying to psych me out: "Alamagordo?"

Yes, I lost, and lived to regret not letting Stephen (or anyone) be on my team. I admit that I wanted the chance to one day watch Jeopardy and say, "I beat that guy at Trivial Pursuit." Is that so terrible? Genaro and Felicia were a lot of fun and we really enjoyed spending time with them.

Also loved the scavenger hunt. I realized way too late that if you make up the list, you can't play, so I was on the judging end this year. I had a ball making up the list with things like:
-a cop, bonus points if he is three days from retirement
-get on tv
-a dharma initiative boat
-recreation of the tatoo scene from "dude where's my car"
-spirit fingers
-a moustache
-turn your team into a band, bonus points if you are on an actual stage with real audience
moustache
spirit fingers
I warned Genaro, who was a team captain, that the judging would be tougher than anything he's seen in law school. He came in to defend his team, and I explained that they had to be penalized because he did not appear in every picture, as per the rules. They had misunderstood and had one team member taking pictures, as opposed to the other teams that had to solicit help from strangers. I explained that this gave them a bit of a time advantage over the other teams. I waited for him to give a counter argument, but he folded quickly:

Genaro: "If you have to give us a zero, I understand. It's not that big a deal."
Me: "Maybe you'd better get someone else in here..."
My brother Paul, entering the room: "That's bogus! You can't expect him to hand his camera over to some stranger on the street! We should get full points!..."

Paul made a stirring defense, including the contention that this fulfills the requirement of both being a band and being on stage with an audience.
I gave him points for a band, but really I think you will agree that this is more "standing next to a band". Would have given it to them if we had seen some air guitar or Mick Jagger-style posturing.

Thoughts from a Househusband

Just yesterday, I was very short and critical with Jessica. She was not feeding Stella exactly as I thought she should be. She of course was doing nothing wrong given that she is a complete natural at being a mom. I learn from her everyday. She has such a casual, relaxed, and easy way with Stella--compared to my northeast Italian/Irish try to control everything freak outs.(those that know me understand) I swear that Stella looks at me sometimes and is thinking--"chill out old man. Where's mom, she'll be ok with me crying right now" Anyway, being snippety with Jessica after a long day was not exactly my finest moment. The transition to being a stay home dad has not been as easy as I thought. Before we brought Stella home, I was sure Stella was just one more thing to add to my "to-do' list.
1. Start a new company
2. Set-up my new office (currently in the guest bedroom closet)
3. Purchase three or four properties
4. Keep the house clean
5. Cook for my hard working woman
and
6. Baby-sit Stella for 8 hours a day

Mentally the demand of taking care of Stella is easy--hence the problem. I imagine some of the worst torture is being denied intellectual stimulation. The prison that I speak of is of my own making. Where stimulation was once easy to obtain, i.e., show up to work and get going, today I have to take the time to seek it out when time is not in abundance. That's one of the reasons seeing Jessica at lunch and at the end of the day is so great. I even suggested to her that we ask each other trivia questions during dinner. How desperate is that! I must admit that being prepared for the next Welsh family trivia game is also part of my motivation.

Child care is a bit more physically challenging--but not by much. I've gained 10 lbs in 3 months, and I'm not even hitting the milk. Stella and I have starting going for walks around the neighborhood. I'm not sure who is more confused by my presence, the old ladies working in their gardens or the Mexicans building houses down the street. Either way, I get polite waves and awkward smiles.

So, the question everyone is asking, "How am I doing being a househusband?" My answer: The most challenging thing I've ever done and I wouldn't do it for anyone on this earth except for Stella.

this kid is trying so hard to talk...

Stephen shot this with our little camera. Not bad, image seems better than with the web cam.

grandpa sighting!!!

We got a special treat tonight - my dad had a layover at our airport and his connection was delayed. We went to the airport to visit him. So good to see him, so much has changed since he last saw Stella.

stuff i like: dvd edition

Since we don't have TV channels in our house (yes, on purpose), everything we see is via DVD. Netflix is good to us. The only down side is that we are a season behind on everything. (Please don't tell me what happened on Lost!!)

Here's some stuff we have seen lately and liked:

The John Adams HBO miniseries on DVD. It was good, based on the McCullough biography that I always meant to read. Well acted, kind of refreshing to see a founding father who was really kind of a schlub. I mean definitely not the whole package like Jefferson or Washington - this guy was brilliant and passionate but also unpopular and had many public failures. But a smart wife.

Also really liked "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly". It's a true story of a man who is paralyzed everywhere but his left eye. Sounds boring, but it is not. A very good film.

We're also on the third season of The Wire (thanks Judy, Paul & Amanda for getting us hooked!) which is sooo good... complicated and intricate and rewards close viewing. Well written and acted, those HBO shows continue to spoil us... (common refrain in our house: "well, it's no 'Rome', but...")

Also like Weeds, the theme song makes a good lullabye for the little one. Plus we feel like good parents when we watch it, just by comparison.

yankee doodle baby

We spent the holiday weekend with Stephen's family, it was fantastic. The other kids were into Stella and she loved it. They all tried to give her toys, even while she was sleeping. We appreciated the effort but she is not quite to the grabbing phase just yet. Her cousins were sweet though, and when she didn't grab what they offered, they just squeezed it onto her person however they could.

Stella's Nana made her a very patriotic headband. She made some others that I will have to take pictures of.

ok, maybe he wasn't exactly a nobel laureate, but still...

Stella and I were in the grocery store the other night, and one of the guys working at the store gave us a friendly hello, how are you doing, etc. We are in Texas, after all, this is not uncommon. Stella was especially mellow, just looking around at everything and taking it all in.

Man at store, looking at Stella: "Is that a boy baby or a girl baby?" (you get this a lot with an orange car seat...)
Me: "a girl"
Man at store: "Wow, she is really smart!"
Me: "Thanks!"

So here I am so proud that my daughter's intellect shows through, even in infancy, to the point where strangers can see it. Then the guy came back with a pint of strawberry flavored milk.

Man: "Can she have some of this?"
Me: "No, she can't, but thank you."
Man: "Really? Isn't this good for babies? It's milk? And strawberry? And pink, and she's a girl?"
Me: "Yeah, but babies aren't supposed to have that stuff yet."
Man, thoughtfully: "Oh. I thought they could have it. I got to learn about babies."

So... yeah. Still, a compliment is a compliment, I will take them where I can...

he must think i'm a pacifist...

The other night I was having a hard time, sort of wimpering and crying a bit (pain and downheartedness from mastitis, a condition I would not wish on my worst enemy). Stephen was taking good care of me and got up to turn off the ceiling fan and promptly tripped once more over Stella's bouncy seat. (What is with that thing? We must trip over it seven times a day. I think he may have actually broken his toe on this one.) I looked down at Stella and explained to her that we were all having a hard time that night. Then I looked up and Stephen was holding a pacifier up to my mouth and looking at me expectantly. I just looked at him like "?". He was like, "oh, right..." and gave it to Stella.
Poor thing had two babies to take care of. Luckily a good laugh sure can make you feel better.

SassyBaby

My cousin Erik & his wife Lyndsay sent us the cutest headband and hat for Stella. (although I strongly suspect that the Lyndsay side of that equation probably deserves most of the credit) Thanks, Erik & Lyndsay! It's from Oh So Sassy.

When we first tried it on her, the flower was just too big for her head. She reminded me of Mrs. Roper from "Three's Company".

But now she has grown into it, and I was finally able to get some pictures of her in it - there are more on our Flickr site:

My college friends will recognize this shot as "CK Baby" - we used to do normal pictures, then a CK version (like the Calvin Klein ads) where everyone looks off camera dramatically.

Stuff I Like: Literary Version

In an effort to stake out a bit of this space for non-baby related topics, here's a few books that are on my nightstand:

Operating Instructions: A Journal of My Son's First Year by Anne Lamott.
This book is a must-read for any new parent. Especially during those first tough/crazy weeks. Here's a quote I like, on wishing she knew God's plans for her:

"This other way is so hard. It always reminds me of the man who has fallen off a cliff but managed to grab onto a weak vine. Holding it, watching it begin to come loose, he looks up toward the top of the cliff and cries out for help. Suddenly, a deep booming voice from the sky says gently to him, 'It is all right, my son. I am here and will never let harm befall you. Just let go of the vine, and fall into my arms. I will catch you.' The surprised man thinks about this for a moment, looks down at the ground thousands of feet below, then up to the ledge above him, clears his throat, and asks, 'Is there anybody else up there?'"

King Dork by Frank Portman
I'm reading this for the second time, it's one of those books that has a good plot and all, but almost doesn't need it because it is just so much fun to read. I probably need to remember to read this again when Stella is a teenager. Chronicles the idiocy of high school, plus an aspiring rock band, plus a mystery.

The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger
I like to think that by not reading it for a while I am emulating the time-traveling husband, who pops in and out. I was reading this while pregnant until I guilted myself into reading some baby/parenting books. I will get back to this one though.

The Pilot's Wife by Anita Shreve
An Oprah selection, borrowed from a friend when I was hungry for a new book. Then I realized the whole book is about a woman whose husband has died. I almost have to put it in the freezer, can't bear to read much more.

Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace
This is a book that I will never finish. And if you think less of me for saying so, let's see you try it! There is just one other book in this category of things I will never finish, and be ok with it: The Idiot by Dostoyevsky. I can live with that. The footnotes alone on this thing will kill you!

If you have any good book suggestions, especially ones that can be read in 15 minute increments, let me know!